Sunday, 13 February 2011

This Morning. 11 am. Clueless and Random

Here we go again.
Long time no write, huh? Miss me? You better not. I'm not worth missing.

So, let's talk about the weather first. It's mildly hot outside and I'm too lazy to move my ass off. I'm just stiffly sitting in front of my laptop, seeking things to get inspired. Yes, get inspired.
(Sometimes I feel so tired writing English, but I got to, I want to)

I bumped into my deviantart account, and found this superbly interesting account. His name is Agan Harahap. I dont know much about him, thing I do is that he is a great artist. His works are extraordinary yet mystically beautiful. He likes to manipulate historical pictures, but he did it excelently. So, I try to find out whether he has another social networking account, and bingo! I got his facebook account and immediately sent friend request. I'm really looking forward to being friend with him. And another thing, he happens in relationship with c.u.t.s's vox, teh itta. My, teh itta, you're a lucky bitch having kang agan as your boyfriend. Wanna share him, teh? In case he bores you? Yes, you will not do that. I wont if I were you. hahaha

Enough for the crap.
I want to write a brief of my thought this morning. At first, I wanted to post it in my Tumblr account, but maybe better if I throw it in this blog. People dont notice too much, so this blog probably is the last thing people will bump into. hahaha

Okay, this morning, oh no, maybe since last night, I'm officially insecure. What makes me so? I'm not quite sure. Maybe it has something to do with my self. I feel so useless sometimes, err, maybe most of the time. Useless because I'm lazy. I'm lazy. I'm too lazy to even care about my self. It's like I'm giving up. But I dont want to. I really want to WANT. Wanting something worth. Worth to die for, worth to pursue, worth it all.

I want something to pursue. I'm lazy to want it. I dont know what to do. I keep telling my self to keep going. I feel my brain is getting rot, and I cannot feel anything. I easily forget something. I procrastinate. I'm tired and exhausted.

I have nothing to hold on to. God, please help me... I'm so out of place.

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