Sunday, 27 March 2011


So, we've been arguing since Friday, ah, nope, last week was our full-o-arguements week.

You are really such a card, bonbon. You can hardly say what you really want. You want me to make a guess always? You know I'll try. I try so hard. I've tried. Yet, still, I try.

But why don't you just tell me if I'm wrong?

Why don't you just tell me what you want?

Cuz I got what I want, and it is you.

Hey You! Piss off of the stage!!

Hiya, Amigo.
Good day you got there? I hope so, a big glass of iced coffee will do =)

Anyway, have you ever been a host? Master of Ceremony? Have you? Well, I have, several times. I don't like it that much. Public Speaking, well, me? Hell No. Haha.

Here, I want to tell you my worst experience of being a host for one of indie community I've involved in years ago. I almost forget how it felt. But I cannot forget, and I believe neither can my friend, how pathetic it was. Hahahahaha.

One day, when my friend and I were in the gathering talking about
Buka Bareng C.U.T.S, the members asked us to be the host of the event because we got along so well than anybody else in the club. Being insisted, we finally accepted the job. (Apparently, my friend and I are classmates till now).

The event was around the corner so we began rehearsing, not so good though, but I thought: "okay, this is the time when you prove yourself, this is the time you go outside the box, outside your zone, to the wild!". That made me calm. At least until the time I had to go on the stage, speaking.

I knew, my friend was nervous, because me too. Actually, my friend and I, both of us, were not that good in public speaking. Really. It was kind of every eyes on us, they expected us to throw some jokes like we usually did in every gathering of the club. And what did we do actually on the stage? Frozen for sure. Hahahahaha. Really, my friend is actually a shy guy if he has to speak in the public. And I am afraid of the crowd, those eyes that seem to rape me and get me naked. But we went on all along the way. We didn't really give a damn about what people probably thought of us, as long as we did our job. No adverb. We just DID our job. Yes, we bored the crowd, that was our job. Hahahaha.

Yet, the event was going nice despite the MC sucked. Oh yeah, it was nice. My favourite band, C.U.T.S, played acoustically in the event.

You know, but I'm proud that, at least, I've been the host in the event where my favourite band played. We got photographed together. They became to know me so well. In one of the event, the voxes even wave at me. Yes, they know my name.
At least, I'm remembered, as the most pathetic MC in their life so far. Hahahaha.

Luckyly, I found some visual traces of me.
*I am the girl (please don't question. haha) with the black-white-stripped long sleeve, the guy next to me is Dimas Setiawan, my friend*


Hey Lucky! I'm with The Band and The Committee

Yeeehaaaaw... Supercuts Members!

Right, who gives the fuck anyway, job's done! =D

Friday, 25 March 2011

Kamu tidak tahu saja, kalau kamu itu ada, dan bermakna

Kamu punya teori sendiri tentang 'serius'.
Kamu kurang lebih bilang: kalau aku merasa senang karena dia, dan merasa galau juga karena dia, itu tandanya aku serius. Kalau kamu mau aku tidak gundah karena kamu lagi, aku bisa, dan itu berarti aku tidak serius dengan kamu.

Saya baru tahu kalau ada teori semacam itu. Maksud saya, dalam bentuk bahasa. Saya tahu, menyayangi seseorang itu beresiko; senang dan galau. Dan saya pernah merasakan senang dan galau yang diakibatkan dari menyayangi seseorang. Namun, pengalaman terlalu menggundahkan saya, yang saya tahu, menyayangi seseorang itu seharusnya menyenangkan, bukan mengkhawatirkan.

Dan itu yang saya rasa terhadap kamu, saat saya tahu saya menyukai kamu. Saya senang. Saya senang karena saya kemudian mampu menyayangi kamu. Mampu lagi setelah sekian lama hati saya beku.

Kamu pun tahu kan, aku senang bersama kamu. Aku bilang.

Tapi sungguhpun, selain merasa senang, aku juga kerap merasa galau, karena kamu.
Kadang aku cemburu, kadang aku pilu.
Aku tidak bilang, aku tidak ingin kamu tahu.

Karena saat kapanpun, baik senang, maupun galau, yang saya cari itu kamu.

Tapi kenapa masih saja kamu tidak bisa memaknai kehadiran kamu untuk saya?
Kenapa masih saja menganggap bahwa kamu bukan apa-apa buat saya?
Apa karena sikap saya?
Apa karena perkataan saya?

Bila menyayangi seseorang itu butuh pembuktian, maka carilah alasan. Jangan tanya saya. Menyayangimu itu perlu lebih dari sekedar alasan yang logis.
Kamu mau tahu arti cinta? Lihat saja kamus. Jangan tanya saya.
Definisi cinta buat saya bukan berupa bahasa, bukan pula kata.

Hanya rasa. Rasa ini, segala getar, segala resah, segala bahagia, yang saya punya untuk kamu.
Kamu bisa buat saya jadi cinta, itu karena kamu punya makna.
Kamu punya makna sendiri.
Dan saya juga punya makna tentang kamu. Kamu saja yang tidak tahu.

Sunday, 6 March 2011

Basic Needs

Ahoy, Amigo!

Every artists needs medium to manifest their ideas into the form of works . For photographer one of the medium is camera.

I found that this picture of mine is quite funny. My friend took it when we dined at one of the best pizza restaurant in town.
As an amateur photographer, I consider my camera as my basic need. This digital single lens reflex is my camera I call "Niko".
This pose just came into my mind. Like food, for me, Niko is my basic need. Not do I literally eat him, the pose just represents me considering Niko as my 'food', things I always need.

Niko is my 'happy meal'. =)

In case you're wondering what Niko and I have made, please visit our DeviantArt account. Here the link -->

Enjoy your meal, Amigo. =)